so i entered a challenge
it is put on by my cardio/kick instructor
it is a "12 weeks to a better you" challenge
we had an instructor come down from Calgary
he did a nutrition course
he did caliper testing
and gave us all some advice
"i don't want you to go on a diet, i would like you to make 12 changes for life"
so, that's the goal for these next 12 weeks
he didn't TELL us what to do, because everyone is different
he did give us advice though
"make 1 change each week for 12 weeks and you will be successful"
so for the next 12 weeks, i get to make a goal!
this week....
drink all my water (12-14 glasses)
i know, seems easy but it is not always easy.
i find that when i do drink all my water, i feel better, sleep better, workout better, less headaches, less swelling in my hands and in my feet, the list goes on.
that is my challenge to you
pick ONE thing this week that you know you can change
it does not have to be big, just one thing
and change it!
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Thursday, May 17, 2012
understanding it
i have come to a realization
changing my diet and working out are the easy parts
DEALING with the reason's why I over eat, that's the hard part
and not slipping back into that pattern, that's hard
this is a time that I have learned more about myself than I ever thought possible
i don't have an official before picture but this is about 1 week before I started losing weight
i look at the picture and it brings back SO many feelings, so many emotions
so much I don't want to deal with BUT I know I have to
and I am
changing my diet and working out are the easy parts
DEALING with the reason's why I over eat, that's the hard part
and not slipping back into that pattern, that's hard
this is a time that I have learned more about myself than I ever thought possible
i look at the picture and it brings back SO many feelings, so many emotions
so much I don't want to deal with BUT I know I have to
and I am
this is me 9 months into my journey
i know, I am not losing weight as quick as I could
but I am trying to deal with they why I gained weight along the way
i am proud of every drop of sweat I have earned while working out
i am so grateful for those who have inspired me along my way
Monday, April 2, 2012
bootcamp
I joined a boot camp
20 days
my goal is to make the food that I eat NOT work against whatever I do in the boot camp
20 days
my goal is to make the food that I eat NOT work against whatever I do in the boot camp
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
Irritated
I never thought I would say this but I am irritated
This is kind of a multiple irritation
On Facebook, there are people on garage sales groups who get on and sell "Quick fixes" for weight loss
"Wraps that will make you skinny"
"drops you put in your water so you don't want to eat"
"This shake or that shake that will fill you up"
This never really irritated me before
I think it's because before I REALLY wanted to get healthy, I am someone who would have bought it
So I am irritated with my old self
But then I get irritated with people who think that that is all they have to do to lose weight
I get irritated with the sellers
I had to come to a realization on my own that it took me a LONG time to gain this weight, it's going to take me a while to lose it
It's been creeping up on me since my teens
There is no such thing as a miracle pill that will take your weight off of you in a month
If there is something out there that will do that for you, it's not healthy for you
Chances are it will cause more damage than good in the long run
In this whole weight loss journey I am blessed to have people who support me
I have people who are willing to give me food tips
A trainer who is willing to push me
I have kids who are willing to get out there and go for a walk with me or be willing to be my weight resistance
Mr. M who buys me healthy food and gym passes (Well he does not BUY them for me, just does not complain about the cost)
Friends and family who encourage me along the way.
This is kind of a multiple irritation
On Facebook, there are people on garage sales groups who get on and sell "Quick fixes" for weight loss
"Wraps that will make you skinny"
"drops you put in your water so you don't want to eat"
"This shake or that shake that will fill you up"
This never really irritated me before
I think it's because before I REALLY wanted to get healthy, I am someone who would have bought it
So I am irritated with my old self
But then I get irritated with people who think that that is all they have to do to lose weight
I get irritated with the sellers
I had to come to a realization on my own that it took me a LONG time to gain this weight, it's going to take me a while to lose it
It's been creeping up on me since my teens
There is no such thing as a miracle pill that will take your weight off of you in a month
If there is something out there that will do that for you, it's not healthy for you
Chances are it will cause more damage than good in the long run
In this whole weight loss journey I am blessed to have people who support me
I have people who are willing to give me food tips
A trainer who is willing to push me
I have kids who are willing to get out there and go for a walk with me or be willing to be my weight resistance
Mr. M who buys me healthy food and gym passes (Well he does not BUY them for me, just does not complain about the cost)
Friends and family who encourage me along the way.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
I have an AMAZING friend
I have a friend who amazes me
I will call her McKinley
McKinley is a name I always wanted to name a little girl
And I didn't name my girl McKinley because I felt like it was not her name
McKinley is also the name of a really popular mountain in Alaska
You can go here to see a gorgeous picture of the Mountain
Anyways, back to McKinley
She has her own journey she has been on
I don't want to tell too much of her journey because that is her's, but I asked for her permission to post about a conversation we had in October
She gave her permission, and I am grateful
That conversation changed the way I looked at my weight and the way I viewed somethings in life
I will forever be grateful for her taking the time to talk to me and give me a boost that I needed
When I am struggling mentally, I think of our talk and it can help me change how I am thinking of myself
McKinley lost a LOT of weight
I knew her when she was at her heaviest
I was a teenager and didn't have the full weight struggle then that I do now, so I didn't understand why someone would be overweight, thinking it was just a choice someone was making to be overweight
I know, I was an ignorant teenager
She has an amazing smile, one which would help anyone feel comfortable around her, like she was their mother
She has the kindest most giving heart
But her eyes had sadness in them
I didn't understand why someone so beautiful had such a sadness in her eyes
It was a sadness that would make someone want to reach out and hug them until they knew how important they are
But I never did that
And I never took the time to understand why she was overweight
I regret that
Fast forward 15 or so years later
I knew she would be coming down to my community and I asked if we could have a visit
She said yes and for that, I will be forever grateful
I knew I could talk to her about anything, not just the weight related
I began to open up about the pain of being over weight and the struggle to lose it
I had been "trying" for 2 months to lose weight
And had wanted to lose weight for 10 years
But never really had met someone who had WANTED to lose weight AND done it
She didn't just lose weight, she changed her life
I think my talk with her was the first time I understood the sadness in my eyes
It was wonderful to talk with her, hear of her success
Hear of her struggles along the way
That it was not always as easy as we may have perceived it
I would see her many facebook posts of her talking about what she did for a workout
She would talk about healthy food choices
She would encourage others in healthy lifestyle choices
And then we talked
We talked about how confident she looks, the happiness she has about her
Not just in her smile or the way she greets you
The happiness in her eyes
It was something that I had not seen when I was a teenager growing up
We talked about how with her losing weight she IS more confident, she IS happier
Then she said something to me that changed the way I thought of everything
She said "I wonder if people could see how important they were are when they are overweight, if it would change the way they carried them self and their happiness"
She wondered if she knew that and realized it before she lost her weight if it would have changed her before she lost the weight
Made me think
I came home and thought about that for a long time
For me, since I have been overweight, I have not felt like I have the right to be confident
I didn't feel like I had the right to be happy because I was not happy with the way I looked
"I am fat, I have earned my misery" is what I would think to myself
So I would try walking with confidence and happiness when no one was looking
It was odd
Then I would try it again
And it would feel slightly less odd
And I still keep trying
The part that really struck me from what she said though was "I wonder if people could see how important they are"
Sometimes, when you feel like you are at the bottom of the barrel, you feel like you have zero importance
The funny looks from people when you struggle with doing simple tasks, the comments of "Well, if you would just lose weight", the fact that you cannot get to the top of the stairs without being out of breath, Struggling to keep your kids on your lap because you have a fat roll on your stomach that gets in the way.
Those all don't do anything that boost your confidence and help crush any little bit of confidence that you do have.
I often think of mountains
I love the mountains and how none are the same
Each have their own paths where there are waterfalls and some have walking trails
Some have steep climbs, others are more of a slow slope
Sometimes you have a flat path that you can walk on for a time being but other times, you have no choice but to go up or head back down
Sometimes the route has to change in order to make it to the peak but as long as you are still moving, you are still making progress
There is something pretty satisfying about making it to your goal in a mountain climb (more another time)
And at the end of your climb, you have a confidence in being able to do something you have not done before
So carry yourself that little bit taller
Put a smile on your face and be happy
You are worth it
Happiness and confidence are not based on the number you see on the scale
It is something that comes from inside you and who you are
Don't give anyone that power to take it away from you
It is yours
Own it!
I will call her McKinley
McKinley is a name I always wanted to name a little girl
And I didn't name my girl McKinley because I felt like it was not her name
McKinley is also the name of a really popular mountain in Alaska
You can go here to see a gorgeous picture of the Mountain
Anyways, back to McKinley
She has her own journey she has been on
I don't want to tell too much of her journey because that is her's, but I asked for her permission to post about a conversation we had in October
She gave her permission, and I am grateful
That conversation changed the way I looked at my weight and the way I viewed somethings in life
I will forever be grateful for her taking the time to talk to me and give me a boost that I needed
When I am struggling mentally, I think of our talk and it can help me change how I am thinking of myself
McKinley lost a LOT of weight
I knew her when she was at her heaviest
I was a teenager and didn't have the full weight struggle then that I do now, so I didn't understand why someone would be overweight, thinking it was just a choice someone was making to be overweight
I know, I was an ignorant teenager
She has an amazing smile, one which would help anyone feel comfortable around her, like she was their mother
She has the kindest most giving heart
But her eyes had sadness in them
I didn't understand why someone so beautiful had such a sadness in her eyes
It was a sadness that would make someone want to reach out and hug them until they knew how important they are
But I never did that
And I never took the time to understand why she was overweight
I regret that
Fast forward 15 or so years later
I knew she would be coming down to my community and I asked if we could have a visit
She said yes and for that, I will be forever grateful
I knew I could talk to her about anything, not just the weight related
I began to open up about the pain of being over weight and the struggle to lose it
I had been "trying" for 2 months to lose weight
And had wanted to lose weight for 10 years
But never really had met someone who had WANTED to lose weight AND done it
She didn't just lose weight, she changed her life
I think my talk with her was the first time I understood the sadness in my eyes
It was wonderful to talk with her, hear of her success
Hear of her struggles along the way
That it was not always as easy as we may have perceived it
I would see her many facebook posts of her talking about what she did for a workout
She would talk about healthy food choices
She would encourage others in healthy lifestyle choices
And then we talked
We talked about how confident she looks, the happiness she has about her
Not just in her smile or the way she greets you
The happiness in her eyes
It was something that I had not seen when I was a teenager growing up
We talked about how with her losing weight she IS more confident, she IS happier
Then she said something to me that changed the way I thought of everything
She said "I wonder if people could see how important they were are when they are overweight, if it would change the way they carried them self and their happiness"
She wondered if she knew that and realized it before she lost her weight if it would have changed her before she lost the weight
Made me think
I came home and thought about that for a long time
For me, since I have been overweight, I have not felt like I have the right to be confident
I didn't feel like I had the right to be happy because I was not happy with the way I looked
"I am fat, I have earned my misery" is what I would think to myself
So I would try walking with confidence and happiness when no one was looking
It was odd
Then I would try it again
And it would feel slightly less odd
And I still keep trying
The part that really struck me from what she said though was "I wonder if people could see how important they are"
Sometimes, when you feel like you are at the bottom of the barrel, you feel like you have zero importance
The funny looks from people when you struggle with doing simple tasks, the comments of "Well, if you would just lose weight", the fact that you cannot get to the top of the stairs without being out of breath, Struggling to keep your kids on your lap because you have a fat roll on your stomach that gets in the way.
Those all don't do anything that boost your confidence and help crush any little bit of confidence that you do have.
I often think of mountains
I love the mountains and how none are the same
Each have their own paths where there are waterfalls and some have walking trails
Some have steep climbs, others are more of a slow slope
Sometimes you have a flat path that you can walk on for a time being but other times, you have no choice but to go up or head back down
Sometimes the route has to change in order to make it to the peak but as long as you are still moving, you are still making progress
There is something pretty satisfying about making it to your goal in a mountain climb (more another time)
And at the end of your climb, you have a confidence in being able to do something you have not done before
So carry yourself that little bit taller
Put a smile on your face and be happy
You are worth it
Happiness and confidence are not based on the number you see on the scale
It is something that comes from inside you and who you are
Don't give anyone that power to take it away from you
It is yours
Own it!
Monday, March 19, 2012
a few pictures
These pictures spoke to me when I saw them
That scared me
While I was not 250, there is a very good chance that my body looks like that inside
If that woman was 5 feet 6 inches, that's exactly what it looked like
It was scary to see
The pressure on my body must have been tremendous
I will never be a super skinny person, I just would like to be healthy
This is how I can achieve it
The big chick on the right, that's how I got the way I am
The chick on the left, that's how I am getting to where I need to be
Sunday, March 18, 2012
This made a difference for me
One day, my friend Mike sent me this picture
I don't know where he got it from so I cannot give photo or personal credit to whomever came up with it
But it is BRILLIANT
And it helped me realize that it is true
If I have a great ATTITUDE, I can do it
But if I don't, I won't succeed
KNOWLEDGE and HARDWORK is not enough
I need to be willing to change my ATTITUDE about weight loss
I cannot look for easy ways out
The easiest part about the whole weight thing was gaining it
The food I shoved in my face took very little thought
That is the same food that sat like a rubber tire around my waist
That is the same food that made it hard for me to do things with my kids
That is the same food that was going to take my life if I didn't start to take myself seriously
Everyday will be a fight to change my ATTITUDE
I had to realize that I was worth any amount of work it would take to lose the weight
I had to realize that there are no easy ways out
I have often thought that I was not worth those changes
It is easy to think poorly of yourself when you feel the way you do and look as horrible as you feel
I had to change my ATTITUDE and realize that I AM worth it, even if I felt like I was faking it
Now that I have lost weight, I realize that I AM worth losing the weight
Not so I am skinny
Not so I lose my rubber tire around my waist
Not so I want to be in pictures
But because I am human and I have value on this earth
It took me years to realize that
I don't know where he got it from so I cannot give photo or personal credit to whomever came up with it
But it is BRILLIANT
If I have a great ATTITUDE, I can do it
But if I don't, I won't succeed
KNOWLEDGE and HARDWORK is not enough
I need to be willing to change my ATTITUDE about weight loss
I cannot look for easy ways out
The easiest part about the whole weight thing was gaining it
The food I shoved in my face took very little thought
That is the same food that sat like a rubber tire around my waist
That is the same food that made it hard for me to do things with my kids
That is the same food that was going to take my life if I didn't start to take myself seriously
Everyday will be a fight to change my ATTITUDE
I had to realize that I was worth any amount of work it would take to lose the weight
I had to realize that there are no easy ways out
I have often thought that I was not worth those changes
It is easy to think poorly of yourself when you feel the way you do and look as horrible as you feel
I had to change my ATTITUDE and realize that I AM worth it, even if I felt like I was faking it
Now that I have lost weight, I realize that I AM worth losing the weight
Not so I am skinny
Not so I lose my rubber tire around my waist
Not so I want to be in pictures
But because I am human and I have value on this earth
It took me years to realize that
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